I am my own worst nightmare — literally

Don't y'all have anything better to do?

Don't y'all have anything better to do?

Do you ever have those nightmares where something really scary is chasing you and you’re finding it almost impossible to run because you’re soooooo tired and your feet feel like they’re encased in cement and each step takes an eternity and you know that scary monster is going to catch up to you and chomp your head off any second now?

… Have you ever wondered what might happen if you turned around and confronted the beast?

That’s what I did in a dream I had some years ago. And the results were NOT what I expected.

Back when I was living in Japan, I had a dream that I was being chased by a horde of demons along the path that runs beside Kits beach. In my dream, the beach was crowded with people suntanning, playing volleyball, and splashing in the waves. Happy couples walked hand in hand along the path that I was running along. Smiling women pushed babies in strollers.

I ran past them all, astounded that they seemed so oblivious to the roiling horde of hell spawn that were right on my heels. No one came to my aid. No one even seemed to notice me. And all the time the demons were catching up, they were gaining on me, I could feel their sulphurous breath on the back of my neck.

At the front of the horde was its master, the head demon, the most evil one of all . Though I hadn’t looked behind me once during the dream I knew this. The head demon, it was the one that wanted to swallow me whole. The others were just along for the ride. There was no way I could outrun it — my feet were so heavy it was like I was walking through quicksand. Even the moms pushing strollers were moving faster than I was.

Then, like a bolt of lightning, it hit me: I was dreaming. I’d had chase dreams like this a thousand times before — and I knew how to end it. All I had to do was turn around and face the monster. As soon as I saw its evil face I would wake up and I would no longer have to run away. I could finally relax and SLEEP — exactly what I’d been praying for!

So I did it. I stopped running altogether and I turned around, confident that as soon as my eyes lit on the monster behind me I would find myself awake in bed.

But I didn’t wake up right away. I looked at the demon at the front of the roiling horde and I blinked and looked again. Then I screamed.

I was staring at myself. My own eyes were staring back at me.

*I* was the monster that wanted to eat me alive.

What do you suppose Freud would  say about that?

scary mirror

2 Comments

  • By Gemma, September 29, 2009 @ 2:09 am

    scary xx

  • By durian jam, November 3, 2009 @ 10:41 pm

    That pic is awesome. Every time I look at it I get creeped out a little.

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